Thursday, February 21, 2013

Flirting Like A 12-Year-Old Apparently Leads To Marriage

So, before I get started I should probably tell you all who I am. My name is Tabs (duh), and I’ve been friends with these ladies for something like 4 years now. You know how most sitcoms have that one token friend from another country? Well, I’m not THE token friend. But I’m close. I think it’s safe to say I’m a token Canadian. Kinda like Robin in How I Met Your Mother, except that I don’t live in NYC.... yet.

Nugs: If you want to relocate to NYC, no argument here. Just sayin.

Lily: So you were a pop sensation that toured malls?!

PS- Canada is still hilarious. 

When the girls asked me to write a post for their Valentine’s series I was like HELL YES! See, like my lovely nerdy friends here, I am incredibly socially inept. As fate would have it, so is my fiancé. The two of us are like one big mound of awkwardness.

Ginny: Am I the only extrovert on this blog who actually loves talking to anyone?

Tits: Nope, Extrovert right here. People just think I'm a bitch.

Nugs: Me too. But I've also been told that I come across as "intimidating."

I’m not normally one to rush into relationships. I like to take my time to get to know the person a bit first before we delve into stuff. But with Scott, I was head over heels from the moment I met him. We had only known each other for three days and we had already started the awkward flirtation. And by awkward, I mean those childish little tickle fights you use in high school to try and see if the other person will hold onto your hand. We spent the whole day doing this while watching Game of Thrones and Harry Potter.

Tits: This is still better than my version of flirting which is generally to act like the little boy who pulls pigtails. I just poke boys and tell them their sports team suck and expect them to swoon.

Ginny: This sounds like a pretty awesome day to me! Flirting + Game of Thrones + Harry Potter = YES

Nugs: FYI, Game of Thrones should usually not be one's base for a solid relationship. You might want to use it to choose your pets, though.

When he suggested that we go out for dinner, I wasn’t sure if he was asking me out on a date or just casually suggesting he didn’t want to cook. (Nugs: That totally sounds like my bf. Not stealth.) After having held hands pretty much all day through our tickle fights, we didn’t even come close to touching each other as we left for dinner. At one point, I accidentally bumped into Scott and awkwardly apologized.

Lily: Ha! I do that too! But I'm also super clumsy.

Dinner was even worse. Although we talked a little bit, for the most part we both sat there awkwardly, trying to figure out if it was a date or not. I stuttered pretty much every time I spoke, and he had this nervous laugh that made him sound even nerdier than he is... in the bad way. I’m pretty sure our waiter got the ‘first awkward date’ vibes off us, because he popped over to check on us and strike up conversations more often than the typical waiter. Still unsure if it was a date or not, I fumbled for my wallet after we were done. Scott assured me dinner was on him, as it was appropriate for the man to pay. An indication I thought might mean it was a date, but I was still unsure. I later found out that asking me out for dinner and dropping the paying line was his attempt at getting me to confirm whether or not I thought it was a date, so he could figure it out too.

Tits: I feel like this is the premise to some indie romantic comedy. If its not a movie yet, it should be.

We went back to his apartment after and popped on a movie again. I think we both wanted to bring up the day’s events but we were both too nervous. He did grab my hand again, this time without the tickle fights.

When it was time for me to take the one-hour drive home, he walked me out to my car, still holding my hand. We stopped beside my car and he pulled me into a hug and we just sort of stood there. I shyly admitted that I hated that I had to leave, and he agreed. He hugged me again and I unlocked my car and opened the door.

To this day, Scott maintains that he had thought of a great way to ask me out in his head, but in that moment, he was so nervous that instead he blurted out “So does this mean we’re dating now?” (Lily: I just had flashbacks to 7th and 8th grade)

Tits: This is so adorable and incredibly nerdy that I approve of Scott all over again.

I had to laugh, which unfortunately made him even more nervous. “I don’t know, does it?”  I asked.
“I don’t know... do you want it to?”

“Do you?” I of course was screaming yes in my head but I didn’t want to say yes if he didn’t want to.

Tits: At this point I would have been all "yes it does" because I can't stand that back and forth not knowing shit and would be like "well since you're letting me make the decision..."

Nugs: Guys never get hints. Just look at my story from before.  

Eventually he said yes and we had our first kiss. He was kind of a bad kisser, so it was really weird, but me being damn good and all, well let’s just say he’s come a long way since then.

Ginny: He must have really swept you off your feet because sometimes a bad kisser can kill any feelings you might have.

My favourite part of the whole thing came after I had left though. I’m sure the girls here will remember that when I was dating my last boyfriend, I often got frustrated with the fact that he refused to change his Facebook status from ‘single’. I didn’t even care about having it saying that we were in a relationship, I just wanted him to take down that damn status that broadcasts that a person is still on the market.

Nugs: I remember that dude. What a world-class douche.

Tits: Yeah I hate that shit. I don't care if we're "facebook official" but don't go around acting like you can fuck anything you want and it won't have consequences.

I got a Facebook notification about five minutes after I left Scott’s place... saying that Scott had just updated his status to say he was in a relationship with me and asking me to confirm. Pretty sure I had a massive grin on my face the whole way home.

Lily: Awwwwww!!!

That was the beginning of one of the most awkward relationships ever. And now that I’m marrying him in two months, I hope that never changes.

Lily:  Triple awww!!!!!

Tits: So Cute!!

Nugs: Strongly Agreed. (Cue romcom end credits here) 

Ginny: Good job Scott ;)

Nugs: +5.

FYI, for those of you looking for more from Tabs, you can find her over at I Am, Therefore I Do. Thanks, Tabs, for guest blogging and letting us be lazy for another few days while we think of our next topic. If any of you ever want to post for us, drop us a line in the comments- we're always looking for minions!


lauren danger on February 21, 2013 at 1:39 PM said...

Aww, this is an adorable story. :)

McGriddle Pants on March 14, 2013 at 1:39 PM said...

OH MY GOD. Its about damn time I found you. I tried to reply to your emial (nonreply@bloggerbitch!) and your blog was deleted (sadpandaface)

Yeayyyyyyyyyy you're here. My life is complete again. :)

Nugs on March 14, 2013 at 1:47 PM said...

You can still find me! I'm blogging at

I REALLY need to write more. I fail at life.

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